Phoenix Arose

I just wanted you to know how much just one call of text masssage makes in my day, it turna a bad day in to a good day and a good day into a great day

that everything here seems 100x better when i hear your voice



i know i don't tell you enought how much these little things mean

i love you

so it's been a bit
why?
well b/c i have been excising the head noise to paper for matt to see. I'm not sure that this is a good idea - it's likely to make him run away and if he does it 's beter to know now that the head noise make him run.

Any way

I did get paid .. there were no slayings at the friut basket

i had lunch with R and it was good to see him - i think i might have freaked him out a bit 'cause i was feelign stand offish - i'm like thta when i'm working - i can't help it

i miss matt - there is no 2 ways about it and i want him home now

School - matt's 1st test is today *thinks good thoughts for him * he studies alot this prenvents us from talking as much as i would like to - which means its a good thing i'm here and he's there other wise the studing would not be happenening

flying matt likes it - i'm sure glad i'm here - 'cuase i'd worry too much they tech him how to stall his plane ... that to me seems stupid (cause i don't want him to die) i understand why they have to do it but if i was there i would be freaking out - thus it a good thing i'm here


Work - it's moving on it's a good job and i generally can laugh about it 99% of the time given that other 1% is composed of blinding rage or crying but i's mostly a good thing

pets - i'm about to get a second puppy also a great dane she's one and still a puppy - this will be fun =)

Head noise volume has been alternationg btwn 150 and 0 crying generally resets the head noise - i've been allowing my self to do that when feeling over welmed and it helps go figure - i'm also writing down the noise which has allowed me to evaluate it better

i've been thingking alot on what i want tin a life - i'm living short of what i want so i'm starting to make changes to imporve that but as i'm in a releation ship i need to comunicate that to Matt as well - hence the aformationed letters

that was 15 min - off to pimp for fruit

so.... i need a people to live with ... Matt wil be in Az or FL for the next 5mths- 1 year - and we are keeping the house it's a 2 bed one office/bed 2.5 bath in Cedar Park (north) and i don't wan to to be ther all by myself. also i have to very neeedy cats and a huge puppy all of which will love you to death

Why you ask well matt is goingto go back to schol to fly reginal jets =) it 's 5months to a year then he will be back he will be ack to visit dueing this period but i done want to have that huge house all to my self withte the 3 pets ....

*le sigh* T minus 3 weeks and counting