Ah-Ha - TMI for some - brain puzzle

[phoenix_arose]

Who:i beleive i have figured out why i stopped pampering my self -
What:relclaimed at least a small part of my self from Kris
Where: in my my clean bath tube
Why: Kris while he din't per se care whether or not i was shaved trimed and purfumed - he simply rewarded me for it - he noticed - in the relationship we had that approval was my life ... so when i dated guys who don't noitice or reward. my brain Tells me that i should stop it's not what "whom ever" wants and so i stop it ... strange that
When: tonight it was shaving my legs with the relization that matt does not notice or care - and enjoying myself
How: i was letting my inner monolog have a live out loud voice (yes i was talking to myself*glares at people*) and i stumbled on this

Comments

[theoldone.livejournal.com]

It's my personal belief that you should groom yourself to suit yourself, and not others. If your partner really prefers you shaven, then do it on your own terms (easy if you prefer being shaven).
Your self image is yours to keep and keep up.

[perfect-drug.livejournal.com]

i too felt that way along time ago ..... it ws just werid listening to a peice of it fall in to place - amazing how long it can take to recover from 1 - 4 year releationship

[theoldone.livejournal.com]

But how do you feel about all of these issues?
Is all of this your choice, or is it for your partner?

[perfect-drug.livejournal.com]

shaving i do to suite me (just waiting for the day laser removal is affordable) - it's a me hang up i just can't stand it

the purfume and extra gooming -- mostly for other people b/c it pleases me to please other people =)

yes i know people-pleaseing is bad.

i feel better having ffigure out the trigger in my brain that makes it happen - i enjoy long bath - which i have been taking alot of and been treating my self better than i have in years =)

Lesson 1 - identify the pattern you don't like (check)
Lesson 2 - find what trigures the pattern (check)
Lesson 3 - find away to alter/replace the pattern to your likeing =)